Biting off more than I can chew...
Tonight I led a Bible Study on Acts 15 at my lifegroup. I had prayed about it, prepared it and promptly went to pieces. I just couldn’t speak – very out of character!! Somehow I limped through it. I had offered to do it as I felt that it was something that I could do now, the last time I did this was around 12 or so years ago. I honestly thought that I’d have to stop. It was horrible and it has knocked my confidence but it has reminded me how I still need to give myself time before doing new things sometimes.
I have started temping at Essex Fire and Rescue Headquarters this week. I thought that might be my idea of heaven (thank you!) until I was having a very intimate relationship with the filing vault… Still, there is work for me for a while so it will make my life a little easier not being the new girl all the time. I shall be working full-time and it will ease me back in gently. After the Bible study fiasco I really don’t want to do anything too demanding.
I do find it a bit of a dilemma. Do I have any children? I cannot bring myself to say “no” but yes will always prompt more questions. It’s a no win situation.
Still, it’s not all doom and gloom. I know how to cheer myself up. After a heavy days filing yesterday, I thought that I would be kind to my feet. Did you know that you can get a foot mask? You have to put it in the fridge (I had to tell Kevin not to eat it…) It gets better, once you apply it you either have to clingfilm your feet or wrap them in plastic bags!! I sported the Asda look – honestly I think that they saw me coming.
Oh, well, at least it’s nearly the weekend.
posted by SarahB @ 11:24 PM
3 Comments:
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Hi Sarah
Sometimes things can be really hard to do, and it can seem more pressurising when you are dealing with other people.
But God can do fantastic things through your weakness.
At CU at school, most weeks we look at something from the Bible relating to some aspect of our walk with the Lord. I sometimes feel very unprepared and incapable fo adding anything to the lives of the Christians I am trying to help.
Sometimes all I can do is share something very small and basic from my heart to try and encourage them. But God still ministers to His people and loves them very much.
Even though I'm often weak at something, God has done lovely things at CU ,and it is very much a blessing to be part of it.
So weel done on giving the Bible study a go, and I know God can use our fish and loaves in very marvelous ways
God Bless Sarah
Keep holding on to those loving promises from our faithful God
shasa
The first time I ever spoke in public, it was at a Youth Meeting on "Objects" (we were supposed to spiritualise an everyday object - more fun than it sounds!!)I spoke about a Bottle of washing up liquid - lasted the whole of 30 seconds, and left me a quivering wreck! My then Pastor's wife said she had decided NOT to speak about a playtex bra ("God lifts and separates us"!!!)
May God honour you, and as Neil said, use you again.
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