40 Days of Purpose - Day 34

Thinking like a servant

I am still dancing inside. I had the opportunity today to explain to a non-believer why I feel joyful irrespective of my circumstances. OK so they thought I was nuts and I made a real hash of describing unconditional love but at least I tried. Thinking about a Servant’s heart in today’s chapter of PDL I was gladdened to be reminded that it is our attitude and not our achievements that matter to God. This goes completely against what our world would have us believe. Think of all those targets and accountability particularly in the world of work. I think it is easy to feel that we are not able to do something rather than seeing a need and asking God for all that we need to minister into a situation. Equally because we may be fledgling servants and are not practised in the art of serving, we may be clumsy but God can still use us anyway.

What spoke to me most today is the definition of “losing your life” as focusing on other people’s needs by forgetting our own. This is a big challenge to me. Sometimes I am completely wrapped up in the world of Daniel and what he needs that I do not allow myself the opportunity to focus on others. When I get to church I try to picture a suitcase (my baggage of life) and leave it in reception so that I can be open to God and coming alongside others in the congregation. That’s my aim but many times the reality is different. It isn’t as if there are many needs within our fellowship. I have just allowed myself to slip into a bad habit spiritually which with discipline, much prayer and the grace of God can be conquered.

The other issue for me about being a servant is establishing your identity in Jesus. As a naturally insecure person I have often wasted much time in worrying about how I come across to others. This is something, which I have to really try hard not to give into but I know that it is my relationship with God that matters. I have always tried (probably too hard) to meet expectations of others which has held me back and suffocated me with trying to live up to their ideals. As it is God that I am serving I know that he loves me and nothing that I do can separate me from his love. It has been a long journey but I now accept myself as being unique and a hand picked creation from God. So in terms of service, I do not now need the constant reassurance and can be confident that whatever I do in Jesus name is all he asks from me.